today at jen's house: Barbie Continues the Geniusness.

THE BARBIE DIARIES

On the immediate future of an annoying bug:

Barbie: I am seriously gonna assassinize that fly.

Regarding the stature of a particular celebrity:
Barbie: I don't know. He's so --s0, frame-ular.

Discussing Jennifer Garner, who in the movie "Electra" isn't much of a girly girl:
Barbie: Well, you do know she was Electrica.

Replying to Bug, who is learning Japanese:
Bug: Arigato!
Barbie: Yeah, uh, Tamagotchi!

During a conversation one day, as Barbie was talking about a friend of hers:
Barbie: "So then she just looked at me, with that 'moose in the driveway' kind of look."
Me: "That what?"
Barbie: "You know. That moose-in-the-driveway look."
Me, stopping to think for a second: "Oooohhh! You mean the 'deer in the headlights' look?"
Barbie: "Oh. Whatever."

One night while I was working, the organizational work of Barbie once again:
Hunk O Man: Oh, it won't kill you not to have any ice cream tonight.
( he leaves the kitchen momentarily)
When he re-enters the kitchen -- all 5 girls are laying on the kitchen table and floor as if they've died.

Having saved her some dinner, which she ate after work:
Barbie: "Why'd you fix me green beans? I hate green beans."
Me: "Because you need some green in your diet."
Barbie: "I'm wearing green. That's all the green I need."
She was actually wearing a green polo shirt.

Regarding a pistol that had been passed on from Hunk O Man's father to him:
Barbie: "Dad, you really should get a newer gun. I mean, that one must be from the Rock Era or something.
Hunk O Man: "You mean the Stone Age?"
Barbie: "Rock Era, Stone Age -- whatever. It's all the same."

Regarding various things she is asked and has no idea what the answer is:
Barbie: "How should I know? What am I, a brainiologist?"

Heard while watching one of the "Superman" movies:
Barbie: "Look! It's the planet Crouton!"

Regarding the dangers of not using the crosswalk:
Barbie: "Dad, I don't think we should be streetwalkers like this."
Hunk O Man: "Honey, I think you mean jaywalkers."

We are shopping and I comment that the clothing looks a lot like it did when I was in junior high:
Barbie: "Mom, it's called retro. Next thing you know, my kids will be dressing like cowboys and indians."

Heard over the phone as the girls and Hunk O Man are crammed into a rental car, heading to the airport, right after Christmas:
Barbie: "Mama, we're squished in here like sushi!"

Remembering a Christmas Day spent in the ER:
Barbie: "Daddy, do you remember I was in the hospital once? I had ammonia."

Driving home from a family reunion, Hunk O Man and I are discussing the relatives we've seen. We are driving in a rural area:
Barbie: "Whatta buncha pigs!"
Me: "Barbie! We don't talk about our relatives like that!"
Barbie: "No, really, Mom. Look!"
I look out the window and we are driving past an actual hog farm -- with LOTS of pigs.

In the car, while passing by the Allen Funeral Home :
Barbie: "Oh, look. There's the Alien Funeral Home."

On global warming:
Barbie: "I'm telling you, if there's an ice age, I'm moving."

Having just seen the movie "Ice Age 3:"
Barbie: "Chasm of death? Is it chasm of death?"
JB: "Yes! I've told you a hundred times! Chasm of death!"
Barbie: "Well I don't . . I can't . . I don't have a good re-memory!"

On month-old birthday cake:
Barbie: "If I eat this, I'll probably choke, then die, then get cancer 5 years later."
Me: "Then don't eat it."
Barbie: "But I'm hungry!"
Me: "Then eat it!"
Barbie: "Mom. Told you.
Choke. Die. Cancer 5 years later."

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Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Barbie Continues the Geniusness.

Well, that Barbie did it again. She is my best source for blog fodder.

Me: "I'm feeling kind of out of it."

Barbie: "Did you take your drugs?"

Me: "No. This headache should get better. I just feel kind of out of it -- you know, like when people are on drugs?"

Barbie: "Yeah, well Mom, most people are out of it when they're on drugs. You're out of it when you're NOT on drugs."

Never let it be said that your kids don't know you better than anyone.

xoxoxox

1 comment:

AntoinetteJuly 7, 2011 at 12:10 PM
Hey there, I have tried to comment on your last couple of posts on your sewing blog, but I can never get a form field when I click on "post a comment". I'm using Google Chrome and haven't had this problem on other Blogger blogs I've been to today. Also couldn't send you an email b/c your Blogger profile isn't linked to an email address. Sorry to hijack your comments here.
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That'll be two cents for your opinion, please. And thanks as always for commenting at Today at Jen's House. : )

today at jen's house

THE BARBIE DIARIES

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Barbie Continues the Geniusness.

1 comment:

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