The Deep and Vast Ponderings of Barbie

Dad:  "Where is that (insert name of object here) thing?"

Mia:  "I don't know."

Dad:  "Well, it's gotta be somewhere."

Mia:  "You're right!  It has to be somewhere.  It can't just be nowhere, cause then it wouldn't be anywhere."

This poses the question as to where things actually go when they're lost.  Thank goodness we have Mia, who apparently has figured this out.  My kid is a genius.

Later . . . from Makaela:

"Where are the french fries?  I need some more yellow things to eat."

xoxoxox

Work, Work, Work.

I subscribe to a number of blogs.  Most are artistic, many are money-saving.  One of the artistic ones today was about the loss of the "trophies" of life, those accomplishments and people to whom we can point and be proud.  All the "look what I did" things.  You can find it here:  Little Apartment on the Prairie

She referred her readers to another blog, saying "This post inspired and touched my heart this week: When Your Trying To Get Your Priorities Straight, in fact it's going on my fridge."

And here is that post:  Holy Experience

I was a young mom like these two women, and I remember what it was like.  My house was busy and loud.  There was laundry and housework and meal preparation and dishes and baths . . . this endless doing of the necessary things in my family's life.

"I was made for this," I thought.  And I was.  I was good at it, and I enjoyed it.  I still do. Having said that, I must admit that I am a horrific housekeeper.  I still love that old saying "Hush up, cobwebs, dust go to sleep.  I'm rocking my baby and my baby won't keep."

We are made and created to worship and love God.  We miss so much of the unseen world because we simply can't see it.  It is beyond the physical realm of the world in which we live, so the great challenge is to strive to see that unseen place.  We can only do that via Jesus, and this draws us back to Him over and over again.

It's easy to say that because these higher callings are so important, the work should usually go by the wayside.  By that I mean not that we let our homes dissolve into chaos -- rather, I just mean letting "work" take last place in our view of our priorities.  As usual, it's much easier to sway from one extreme to the other, instead of trying to find the balance between the two.

But I think work is right up there with those higher callings.  God gave us work; it is the thing that keeps us engaged and learning and involved and interested, and even connected to each other.  I believe there will be work in heaven.  The word gets such a bad rap -- "work" -- as if it's always hard.  But it can be incredibly rewarding.  I remember doing laundry in the basement of the house, folding and matching endless pairs of little socks.  And when it was all done, I had a deep, incredibly wonderful feeling of accomplishment.

I connect with God through worship.  He meets me there and fills me up.  I could never do without that, without pursuing a life of adoration and worship for Him.  But . . . I also glorify Him for giving me work.  Working with my hands and accomplishing something is simply doing what He has made me to do.  It's like a child looking up at a parent, and when we do it well, God is as pleased with us as we are with ourselves.  It's all good.

We must be careful because we are compelled to measure.  And measuring only gains us meaningless trophies.  I loved seeing all that laundry done -- but it wasn't really something I thought should be reported on the nightly news.  It's just laundry, after all.

But it was my work.  And I did it well, and God was just as pleased then as He is when I look up and praise Him or pray or ponder the unseen world.

Oh, the love of God and the balance to which it challenges us.  Talk about work.

xoxoxox

Operator, How May I Connect Your Call?

<sup>From II Corinthians 6:


11-13</sup>Dear, dear Corinthians, I can't tell you how much I long for you to enter this wide-open, spacious life. We didn't fence you in. The smallness you feel comes from within you. Your lives aren't small, but you're living them in a small way. I'm speaking as plainly as I can and with great affection. Open up your lives. Live openly and expansively!


If ever there was a call to the body of Christ -- the Church -- today, it is this it.


xoxoxox

Aufedersein (Our Feet are the Same)

Some observations from II Corinthians 5:


We've been given a glimpse of the real thing, our true home, our resurrection bodies! The Spirit of God whets our appetite by giving us a taste of what's ahead. He puts a little of heaven in our hearts so that we'll never settle for less.

I can't tell you how many times that Hunk O Man and I have looked at each other and said "It just doesn't get any better than this, does it?"  Not on this earth, maybe.  But what a gift to get just a taste of what is to come!

If I acted crazy, I did it for God; if I acted overly serious, I did it for you. Christ's love has moved me to such extremes. His love has the first and last word in everything we do.

So it's all your fault.  Metaphorically speaking.

 ^14-15Our firm decision is to work from this focused center: One man died for everyone. That puts everyone in the same boat. He included everyone in his death so that everyone could also be included in his life, a resurrection life, a far better life than people ever lived on their own.

So knock it off with all this "my Dad can beat up your Dad" nonsense.  (So to speak.  With laughter.)

^16-20Because of this decision we don't evaluate people by what they have or how they look. We looked at the Messiah that way once and got it all wrong, as you know. We certainly don't look at him that way anymore. 

What a relief.  We're all the same.  The ground at the foot of the cross is level.

Now we look inside, and what we see is that anyone united with the Messiah gets a fresh start, is created new. The old life is gone; a new life burgeons! Look at it! All this comes from the God who settled the relationship between us and him, and then called us to settle our relationships with each other. 

So let's get to it, shall we?

xoxoxox

Only Ten Things.

From Romans 4 -- (The Message) --

^4-5If you're a hard worker and do a good job, you deserve your pay; we don't call your wages a gift. But if you see that the job is too big for you, that it's something only God can do, and you trust him to do it—you could never do it for yourself no matter how hard and long you worked—well, that trusting-him-to-do-it is what gets you set right with God, by God. Sheer gift.

I read this just now and was reassured.  Believe me, I need to be reassured right now.  Here is why:

Around about late February/early March, Hunk O Man and I had decided it was time to put our house on the market. We'd spend Spring Break, the first week of April, doing the odd and end things to get it ready.  Then, April 12 we'd put it on the market.

So Rhonda called and said "I know it's not ready yet, but I have this couple who'd like to look at your house.  Do you think I could show it to them?"  This was the second week of March, a full month prior to the time we had planned to put it on the market.  Rhonda is not a pushy kind of gal; she is sweet and accommodating.  But we thought hey, why not?  So we cleaned it up and I staged it, and the couple saw the house.

And they loved it.

On March 22, we had a signed contract and a closing date of April 25.  But -- we had a lot to do.  I only had about 10 things to do.  The list went something like this:

1.  Re-screen the back porch.

2.  Write two research papers.

3.  Read "A Streetcar Named Desire" and write an essay on it.

4.  Paint the dining room.

5.  Write six more essays for final exams.

6.  Make two prom dresses.  Don't use a pattern, just design one as you go and copy the other from an existing dress.  Drive the 1.5 hours to Raleigh about 3 times for fabric and patterns and notions and more fabric.

7.  Pack up the entire house.

8.  Prime and paint the kitchen cabinets.  

9.  Put a door on the closet in Bug's room, paint Babydoll's room, touch up the peeling paint in the laundry room, paint all the wainscoting that ran (quite literally) everywhere in the house.

10.  Try not to lose my mind.

And you know what?  I prayed a lot, worked hard, and God made it all happen.  It all got done and everyone's mind, including mine, came out intact and functioning normally.  The job was clearly too big for us, and God got it done.  

So with such a fresh example in my head, why am I freaking out now?

Because the house we live in now is my favourite house of all the houses in which I've ever lived.  I LOVE this house.  But -- this house is on the market also.  It has been for over 2 years.  We agreed to an open, month-to-month lease because we thought we'd probably find another house.  

We had a showing on Wednesday (my birthday, no less!).  The a/c was broken and it was probably 90 degrees and 90% humidity in the house.  I picked it up but didn't really "clean" it -- too hot to run the sweeper!  I can stage a house and make it fabulous, and I didn't do that.

But -- the people loved the house.  And yesterday, I had to go back to God and ask "Really?  You would make me move 6 weeks after I moved into the house I absolutely love and you would do it on my birthday?  Really?"

Now let's just hang on a minute here, Jen.  Am I talking to the same God who enabled me to accomplish that list of the 10 things?  What is the matter with me?  What makes me think He would put me in such a position?

I hang my head as I realise this:  I had to get past the freaking out part before I could step into the trust.  I wish it were one easy motion.  But I am a horrible sinner and it is not one easy motion.  Of all those I could trust the most -- the One who has never failed me -- I seem to trust Him the least.  I know God, really know Him.  I know better than to not trust Him.

So He reassured me today with Romans 4.  Because He loves me, and doesn't want to give me too much, and He wants me to remember that He never will give me too much.  If I have to move again, there will be another list of 10 impossible things and He will get them accomplished, not me.  Or even just one impossible thing -- that I don't lose my mind and have to be sent to the nut house -- and God will still keep me sane.  

¹⁶This is why the fulfillment of God's promise depends entirely on trusting God and his way, and then simply embracing him and what he does. God's promise arrives as pure gift. 


When everything was hopeless, Abraham believed anyway, deciding to live not on the basis of what he saw he couldn't do but on what God said he would do.


The same thing gets said about us when we embrace and believe the One who brought Jesus to life when the conditions were equally hopeless. The sacrificed Jesus made us fit for God, set us right with God.


Promise, after promise, after promise.  I am thanking God today.

xoxox

The Cost of Living

For over a week now, we've been without air conditioning in 90+ degree heat.  We do our best to cool things off with ceiling fans cool nights.  But overall, it's made us pretty hot -- and it's humid -- and tempers are short because we're all very uncomfortable.

Which brings me to this:  Proverbs 15.  When I read these things:

¹³ A cheerful heart brings a smile to your face;
   a sad heart makes it hard to get through the day. 

¹⁵ A miserable heart means a miserable life;
   a cheerful heart fills the day with song. 

³⁰ A twinkle in the eye means joy in the heart,
   and good news makes you feel fit as a fiddle. 

I think of my youngest child, Babydoll.  She's 14 and one of the greatest joys of my life.  And she's pleasant and easygoing even in the midst of this uncomfortable heat.  More than anyone I know -- and I know a lot of people --  she is a living example of these verses.  

Babydoll shouldn't even be here.  She was a surprise gift from God when Hunk O Man and I had decided that four children was enough.  We were done.  So when news of Babydoll came along, there was considerably less excitement and joy greeting the news.  This changed, of course, in the days that followed and especially on the day of her birth.  She has been a joyful child from the start.

I remember someone asking me just why I had to have five children.  Couldn't I have stopped at three?  It's a fair question; kids cost a lot of money.  College alone for just one child these days will send you into the poorhouse.

I honestly didn't know what to say, but I was offended at the question because I love every one of my children.  So I countered with this:  "which one would you like me to get rid of?"

I didn't have five children.  I had Rose, Bug, Barbie, JB, and Babydoll.  I had the privilege of bringing five people into the world.  They aren't nameless "kids," they are unique individuals that contribute to the world around them.  They drive me and each other crazy.  They are talented and smart.  They are thoughtless, careless, and stupid -- and the apples don't fall far from that tree!  They are sweet, kind, and generous.  They cost a fortune with their makeup and trips to Sonic and movies with friends and school fees and uniforms and Christmas and birthday gifts.  They make even me question just why I had to have five kids and not one or two or three.

But above all else, they delight God with their being.  He glories in Rose, in Bug, in Barbie, in JB, and in Babydoll.  

So there you go.  We may all be irritable with each other due to a lack of air conditioning in 90 degree heat.  We do drive one another crazy.  There are never any glasses out of which to drink.  The washer works day and night. But . . . 

Thank you God that this house has a cool basement.  And for my girly-squirrelies, cause they are priceless.

xoxox

June

Baccalaureate, Commencement, Graduation.  Have you ever noticed how many times the speakers at these events refer to "not an ending, but a beginning?"  Both things are true.

The interesting thing to me is that the end of the long climb culminates at the top of a mountain.  And if you're looking out from a high place, you can usually catch sight of other pinnacles -- other high places.  So to look out from high school graduation, it's easy to see things like college graduation, marriage, children.  These things are not in focus because they're far away.  But they are in sight, because they're all high points that stick up and are visible from the top of the graduation mountain.

What we forget is that deep valley that lies between us and them.  There is no hopping across because the distance is too great.  The easy part lies straight ahead, and that's the downhill journey.  It's often an easy slide.

The hard part comes when we're faced with the uphill climb from the flat part between the two heights.  The edge of the valley, as it were.  We've gotten comfortable with things being relatively easy and achievable.

Now comes the hard part.

The nice thing is that this climb upward always culminates in reaching the pinnacle.  It might be slow, and it will most certainly be difficult.  But it will end.  And again, all those other high places will be in sight again.

Barbie graduates from high school this Friday.  Rose and Bug graduated last year, and JB will graduate next year.  I love the top of this particular mountain, because it is so filled with possibility.  I also (at this point in my life), am able to see the tops of so many other mountains, in every direction, where my girls will go and climb but I will not.  They aren't my mountains.  And that part makes me a bit sad -- I know it's the way of things, but knowing it and feeling it are distinctly different.

So I will throw parties and celebrate and smile and laugh and photograph as much as humanly possible.  When you're on this mountain, you see an entire range ahead.  Tired?  Oh, no -- not when you're young, still a teenager, and this is the very first mountain.  Full of excitement?  Definitely.  Bring it on.

I see this shining in my daughter's eyes and I am proud.  Give me the biggest kiss and hug possible, Little Girl, and off you go.

And here, you'll need a snack.  And some money.  And don't forget to call.  And drive carefully, there are crazies on the road out there.  Do you have your pillow?  Did you remember your important papers?  Here, give me another kiss.  Oh, wait, I forgot to give you that thing . . . where's the camera?

xoxoxox

It's Not a Contest

^{From Romans 12:}

^9-10Love from the center of who you are; don't fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.

^11-13Don't burn out; keep yourselves fueled and aflame. Be alert servants of the Master, cheerfully expectant. Don't quit in hard times; pray all the harder. Help needy Christians; be inventive in hospitality.

^14-16Bless your enemies; no cursing under your breath. Laugh with your happy friends when they're happy; share tears when they're down. Get along with each other; don't be stuck-up. Make friends with nobodies; don't be the great somebody.

^17-19Don't hit back; discover beauty in everyone. If you've got it in you, get along with everybody. Don't insist on getting even; that's not for you to do. "I'll do the judging," says God. "I'll take care of it."

^20-21Our Scriptures tell us that if you see your enemy hungry, go buy that person lunch, or if he's thirsty, get him a drink. Your generosity will surprise him with goodness. Don't let evil get the best of you; get the best of evil by doing good.

Yesterday, I missed reading my bible because I slept all day -- jetlag. My mini-vacation in California caught up with me. This happens a lot (not the jetlag); I'll miss a day and then pick up reading the next day.

However, As Hunk O Man puts it, "It's not a competition, Hon. Nobody's keeping track." I tend to become so OCD that I think I have to go back and read it all -- but he's right, it's not a competition. The idea is to spend some time in the Word each day, not make some kind of requirement to read it all no matter what.

So I noticed that today was Romans 14 & 15. I pulled it up, and realized that I'd missed Romans 12 from yesterday. Romans 12 is one of my favourite passages. So, I went to yesterday and pulled that up.

What a treat. I got what you read above -- and what encouragement it is!

I have this emailed to me each day. I never read my bible when I had to pick it up and do it. But this makes it so easy!

Here's a link if you'd like to do the same: BiblePlan

The moral of this story, today, for me -- once in awhile, it's good to go back and catch what you missed, if possible. It might be a blessing you could use.

xoxoxox

Sliding into Home Base

My brother wrote to me recently from Iraq. He said this:

I read something once that said:

"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming... "Wow! What a ride!"

I love the picture in my mind that I see when I read these words. It makes me think of the apostle Paul, who said these words in Philippians 3:

17-19 Stick with me, friends. Keep track of those you see running this same course, headed for this same goal. There are many out there taking other paths, choosing other goals, and trying to get you to go along with them. I've warned you of them many times; sadly, I'm having to do it again. All they want is easy street. They hate Christ's Cross. But easy street is a dead-end street. Those who live there make their bellies their gods; belches are their praise; all they can think of is their appetites.

20-21 But there's far more to life for us. We're citizens of high heaven! We're waiting the arrival of the Savior, the Master, Jesus Christ, who will transform our earthy bodies into glorious bodies like his own. He'll make us beautiful and whole with the same powerful skill by which he is putting everything as it should be, under and around him.

We're right there with him, running this race, jogging the marathon, ready to jump and land flat on our bellies as we slide toward the finish line, bruised, aching, tired, old, probably with a black eye, filthy, ragged, and proclaiming "Wah-hoo! What a ride!"

I personally need to remember this when I'm so focused in on my very small life, in my very small town, and my very small issues, only growing narrower and narrower in my view. This abundant life is a glorious ride! It is designed specifically to wear you out and use you up! Go for it!

xoxoxoxox

My Week

Well, it's a good thing I got some serious meditative relaxing in at the beach last weekend.

This was my week:

1. Day One: I am full of energy! Mr. J comes to paint the ceilings. Start laundry while Hunk O Man moves furniture and moves decorative items onto kitchen table. Entertain Mr. J and fix him a glass of Diet Coke while I decide on a new paint color for kitchen. Remove all faceplates from switches and outlets. Move all the stuff out of the kitchen. Go get paint for kitchen at Lowe's. Decide it also matches the family room. Repaint family room after Mr. J leaves. Swap out old outlets and switches from almond to white. Finish that, move all furniture and decorative items back in family room. Clean up brushes and pans for paint. Fix dinner. Tell kids to take all the dishes off the kitchen shelving so I can paint tomorrow. Collapse into bed. Get up from bed and realise that Barbie is the only one removing the dishes. Help her until all things are removed and kitchen is ready for Mr. J. Collapse into bed again.

5. Day Two: Coffee with Barb and Donna. Come home greatly encouraged! Cut in all throughout kitchen with yellow paint. Do more laundry. Try not to be angry with girls for not helping remove dishes from shelves. Get sewing room ready for painting tomorrow by moving things out and around. Clean up paint mess. Realise I got the wrong switches for the kitchen to swap out. Tell girls to do the dishes. Help Barbie with cheerleading moves and dances because this week she's trying out. Collapse into bed. Have I been this tired lately?

6. Day Three: Finish painting kitchen. Put clean laundry in a heap in bedroom, realising that things in the laundry room are now a total mess because girls are doing their own laundry. Realise the ground beef I got out two days ago has been sitting in the kitchen sink defrosting, covered with a plastic sheet. Help Mr. J load his truck up with everything. Tote ladders, paint cans, and drop cloths out to his van and chat. Decide I hate the color in the kitchen. Cable guy arrives and tells me the reason I can't get reception on digital channels is because they have to replace a cable down the street. Hunk O Man reminds me to research cheaper cable/phone/internet rates. Go to Lowe's and realise I didn't get the wrong switches after all, I just need to be some kind of electrical genius to figure the combination switch out. Tell the girls again to do the dishes. Deal with Baby's screaming, stomping meltdown about going to Wednesday night church. Pick up pizza for dinner. Collapse into bed. Can't remember when I was this tired. Hunk O Man tells me I am getting too old for this. Naah, I reply.

7. Day Four: Experiment with glaze and various colors and patterns on kitchen wall. Realize I now have two extra gallons of yellow paint I will not be using and cannot return. Hate everything I try. Decide to just paint it all white and be done with it. Thank God that I have an almost-full gallon of white sating paint in the shed. Start painting again. Fall off ladder while stepping down from the countertop. Feel like an idiot and tell Baby that I'm fine, the worst thing was that I got paint all over the floor. Tell the girls to do the dishes again, and Rose loads the dishwasher but leaves pans all over counter. Take Bug to her new job. Scrape all paint off wood floor and decide to use drop cloths from here on out. Finish the walls behind the kitchen shelving and put all the dishes back. Try and put sewing room back in order after ceilings were painted. Shut the door to the laundry room so I don't have to look at it. Paint all but over the doorways with white. Clean brushes and pans, open all windows, thank God that it's warm outside. Collapse into bed. Get up at 2AM and climb into bed with Rose because of Hunk O Man's snoring. Rose is mad.

8. Day Five: Rose gets up for school and makes a ton of noise specifically designed to wake me up because she's mad I am sleeping with her. I go back to my own bed. Get up at 11. Drink some coffee. Hunk O Man makes me an omlette. My right leg is sore from that fall yesterday and what in the world is going on with my right foot? Take a 2 hour nap. Go with Hunk O Man to new burger place and get an amazing peanut butter malt I do not need. Take another nap and some ibuprofen. Answer phone and it's the cable people; spend 45 minutes making arrangements for them to take over our phone service. Make pizza dough. Remind Bug to clean up the kitchen before she goes to work. Finish painting in kitchen. Decide not to make pizza because kitchen is still a mess. Clean up spilled cup of glaze + paint off wood floor. Spend two hours on the phone with cable people because they didn't register the serial number on cable box and it quit working. They can't fix it until tomorrow. Unhook cable box and think twice about throwing it in the yard and setting it on fire. Fold all laundry. Deal with Baby, who is furious that there is no pizza because of sister's selfishness. Hook up tv directly to cable and watch tv until I fall asleep.

9. Day Six: Research DirectTV. Keep smelling and tasting that funny taste you get when you're getting a cold. Drink more coffee. Smile at the faithful dog who always greets me and loves me. Thank God for warm weather. Take a vitamin and read my bible, my favourite passage in Proverbs. Start another load of laundry. Hope the kitchen will finally get cleaned up today. Thank God that Bug is in a good mood. It's been a pretty regular week, all things considered. Maybe I'll plant something today.

I think I'll call my mama.

xoxox

If Wishes Were Horses, Beggars Would Ride

I got a wonderful opportunity today to teach about 20 women at our church about freezer cooking. You know -- where you cook it all in one day and freeze it? (see Today in Jen's Kitchen) My mom and I have done this for years. My heart for ministry these days lies with young wives and young moms. So many were latchkey kids whose mom had to work. There is a huge generation of young women who have missed the wonderful teachings about home from their mom or grandma.

I love that kind of thing, so today was really fun. I talked about cooking, did some cooking (how DO those cooking show people do that?), we all ate some of my cooking, and then I briefly touched on coupons and saving money. A pretty good time was had by all.

Then Hunk O Man picked me up and we drove over to Sonic for a half-price Coke. Sonic has happy hour from 2-4PM, so their drinks are half off.

Now you probably know that Sonic is a drive-in. Like the old-fashioned kind, where you pull up to the menu and order and the people roller-skate out to bring you your food.

So we're sitting there, and there's a truck with a man and a woman next to us on my side. It's a warm day, so everyone's windows are down, and I notice that he is a middle-aged "painted" man with lots of tattoos. Cool! I think: I'll bet he has a story. I'd love to hear it. I thought I might speak to him, but it was awkward, so I just looked away.

Then he pushed the button to order, and this is what we heard between High-Pitched Animated Cheerleader-sounding Sonic Girl and him. Be sure to add the eastern Carolina drawl in your head:

HPACSSG: Hi, welcome to Sonic, what can I get for you today?
Painted Man: I'd like a large Diet Coke and a medium Blue Coconut freeze.
HPACSSG: OK, a large Diet Coke and medium Blue Coconut freeze? Is that all? Would you like some cheesy tots or anything else?
Painted Man: Yeah. A bag of money.
HPACSSG: Oh, um, we don't have bags of money. Sorry about that . . .
(brief pause)
But we do have bags of ice!
Painted Man: Nope, I don't need no ice. Just a bag of money.
HPACSSG: Well we don't have bags of money. But you know, you could buy the bag of ice and maybe sell it for a bag of money.
Painted Man: Nah, don't think so.
HPACSSG: Are ya sure?
Painted Man: Yep.
HPACSSG: Ok then, a large Diet Coke and a medium Blue Coconut freeze and no bags of ice or money. That'll be $1.76. Thank you for choosing Sonic!


Hunk O Man and I nearly fell out of the car laughing. It was one of those priceless moments you rarely get to witness.

God, please bless that man with a bag of money today, even if it's just some change leftover in a fast-food sack. Thank you for Jesus, our Saviour, Amen.

xoxox

New Year's Resolutions

I was thinking about New Year's resolutions earlier last week, and came to some conclusions about myself.

Making these resolutions, i.e., "resolving that I will do this or that," isn't going to do me much good. I can have all the resolve and good intentions possible and still walk wholeheartedly down the wrong path.

Instead, I decided to make some commitments. Or rather, just one commitment.

And that commitment is to pray for self-control.

When I really thought about it, the things I need to do are lose weight, spend less money, exercise more.

The reason I don't do these things is that I have very bad self-control. Little to none. I am one of those immediate gratification people -- I want it, and I want it now. NOW.

So I have committed to pray for self-control in my life. I am seriously committing to asking God (believing) for self-control in every area of my life.

It's like one-stop shopping. I cover all the bases with one fell swoop.

So far I'm doing great with the spending money but not so great with the diet and exercise. But this is a process, and His mercies are new every morning. Everytime I fall down, I get up and pray that prayer again -- "Lord, please provide me with self-control. I know You can."

Yesterday was a bit sunnier, and I was grateful for that. I got a haircut and fresh nails; I'm back to having bangs again, as I've had most of my life. I feel like myself again. I drove kids and kids' friends home from their swim meet last night and felt great about being a mom.

And God, in His great and infinite wisdom, did not see fit to blow one of the 28 pine trees in my yard into my kitchen. Dang. And this although nearly half of central NC blew away last night with the wind. The swim meet was cancelled when the lights all went out.

Today I'm going to try and get control of my domain -- and that means clean house! I am a terrible housekeeper in that I often keep it picked up but seldom clean. I depend on my kids for that. But two days ago I cleaned out the pantry completely and today I need to work on the laundry room and my sewing closet. Just the thought of it makes me sigh, and yet IT MUST BE DONE!

So here's to 2009: I lift my cup of hazelnut coffee in praise of the God who is faithful and who will keep me on track!

xoxox

All Is Well

Man. What a December.

First it was Babydoll and me in the play, Peter Pan. Tons of fun, and we're going to do Cinderella in February. We're all (as in all 6 of us, excluding Hunk O Man only), are in the chorus and I'm going to help with costumes.




Then Christmas hit. As in, hit me upside the head! I've done virtually all of my shopping online and had it shipped up to my Mom's house (where I currently am until Friday, the 26th). I'm still short one Santa gift, but doing pretty well on the rest. I was able to save quite a bit this year by utilising my Visa card reward points. I'm telling you what, it's not a bad deal and you can spend it like free money.

Then I got on Ebay and found a couple of things, and made sure I went through Upromise and SwapBucks, etc for other stuff. So the money savings has been good this year.

We had a trip to Monticello last week -- just Babydoll and two of her friends, EB and CG. We played CatchPhrase virtually all the 2 1/2 hours there -- and I got them all headbands with springy disco ball thingys on them, so it was me and the three also-homeschooled aliens. The weather was terrible, but we had a good time anyway. That place is amazing -- Thomas Jefferson is amazing! We'll definitely be going back in the spring. I am determined that my kids are going to see some of the history that surrounds us within a 3-hour drive of the NC/VA border where we live.

We also had a look at downtown Charlottesville, which was your typical college town -- wonderful in its history and creativity. I recommend a visit if you get the chance.

I make Christmas dresses every year -- except not this year. It just didn't happen. Sometimes we must let things go. Instead, I'm doing a little gift project for the girls for everyday. I think it will all turn out fine in the end.

We did get our Christmas tree, finally. Hunk O Man ended up going over to the tree farm, and the guy was the former art teacher's husband, and the art teacher loves Bug, and they got to talking -- in the end the guy gave him the tree for free. So there you go. I married an amazing man who is not only stingy and frugal, but is able to make the most beautiful Christmas tree materialize out of thin air. Waiting a little longer just makes it prettier -- and I am determined to leave it up until mid-January and thoroughly enjoy it!

Merry Christmas!

Bible Trivia Nights

Hunk O Man has been trying to stump the girls at the dinner table. They're all PK (Preacher's Kids) so they should know some stuff about the bible, right? I mean, you don't sing things like "Zaccheus was a wee little man . . ." and "The B-I-B-L-E" for years and years without learning something, right?

Well, JB has really gotten into it. No surprise, really, because she's the brainiac of our house.

So the other night, Hunk O Man asks this: Why did Mary and Joseph go to Bethlehem?

JB frowns. She is stumped.

Hunk O Man gives her a hint. "Remember? All the inns were full? Why would that be?"

(we read the Christmas story, directly from Luke 2, EVERY YEAR)

JB: "Oh! I know! Because it was Christmastime!"

Friday Randomness

I like helping the girls study for tests. One year I learned all the pertinent details about North Carolina's history and the part it played in our country's independence. Last night it was all about how DNA, RNA, viruses, and bacteria work. Seriously microbiology -- stuff about translation and transduction and mutation and cytoplasm and splicocenes.

After two chapters I thought my brain was going to explode. But Rose just kept giving the right answers! My children are brilliant. What can I say?

Well, I can say this: I think they get all that intelligence from their Daddy!

Have you ever heard of Cheap Stingy Bargains? This website has a plethora of deals. A nice freebie list, too. You can get it via email each week. It's especially useful when you are in the market for virtually any electronic device -- but it also has list after list of deals no matter what you seek. Lately I've been printing coupons and checking out money-saving websites and blogs. But I've gotten CSB for a couple of years now.

Another great money-saver is the Dollar Stretcher. You can get both the regular newsletter and a weekly "reader's tips" newsletter via email. It always has good stuff and lots of links to everything frugal.

I'm getting ready today to go freeze to death up in Ohio, which is "Civilization Yankee." (as opposed to "Civilization North, which is just Virginia").

It is amazing to me that I have two roses and all my impatiens still in my yard, blooming. Even my sweet alyssum is still going strong, even though our nighttime temps have been in the 30's and 40's. But my Mama says that it's cold up north. I'll have to break out the turtlenecks and winter coats. Brr. I may have been born there but I most certainly do not belong there.

I belong on a tropical beach with warm ocean water. Most definitely.

And lastly, tonight is the first swim meet of the season. My Rabid-Screaming-Jumping-Up-and-down-Totally-Embarassing-My-Swimmers -Inner-Swim-Mama is about to emerge.

And you know, all that hollering is so effective when their heads are under water. Like they even can hear me. Or would go faster if they actually could hear me.

And that makes me laugh, so I hope it makes you laugh as well. Have a pointlessly screaming good weekend! I will!

xox



p.s. I am totally IN LOVE with these boots, which I could never afford. It's the cute heel --

What I actually planned to do yesterday: sew like crazy. Make more aprons. Up the stock in the Etsy shop.

What I actually did do yesterday: grocery shop. The "big shop." Sam's Club and Aldi. I sneaked in a trip to Goodwill, also, and made a slight killing. Many plans for scarves and aprons out of other things. Plus, I found this Ohio State Buckeye throw for just $2.99 -- in NC State and UNC territory! Go figure!

So today I must sew, sew, sew.

One thing that irritated me yesterday and still does today: Babydoll was too young, apparently, to check out the two books I need -- "Red" and "White" by Ted Dekker -- because they are adult fiction and she is only 13. She went to the library without me yesterday. And then today is Veteran's Day, and the library is closed. While I appreciate their policy on keeping adult fiction out of the hands of small children -- she is 13, and I honestly thought these books were in the young adult fiction section. I appreciate policy but I bristle under the inconvenience.

I am such a person who is "spirit of the law" versus "letter of the law."

Dang!

One thing that made me happy yesterday and makes me happy again today: I am going on a very short trip this weekend! It's off to Columbus Ohio and parts home to see my Mama. A friend here needed a traveling companion to drop off some mission items, so I'm it! I get a break, I get to read, I get to be with my Mama, I get to do some nominal Christmas shopping.

Life is good!

And now I must leave you and get those girls o' mine to clean up the big mess all the Marco Polos made last night during their movie night with popcorn and pizza.

I love it when all the kids come over. They're so much fun.

xox

But Enough About Me. Let's Talk About You. What Do You Think of Me?

Let me just share a couple of things about myself today. Things I thought you might want to know.

First of all, I have the highest degree possible to attain in the ancient art of Wei-Ning. I know! Impressive, isn't it? I started when I was just a baby, and as of now I'm not only an expert, I have BEEN an expert for most of my life. Just ask my mother.

Wei-Ning? (It's pronounced "Why-ning").

Secondly, I am an excellent mother and I take no nonsense. Here's an example: the twins were 5, Barbie was 4, JB was 2, and Babydoll was 1. I was completely fed up with the mess everywhere. Nobody would help, nobody would put toys away, it was a mess. And of course that was during the crazy-without-drugs days, so I threw a fit. I yelled. I ranted. And I said this: "If you're going to act like pigs, I'm going to treat you like pigs!"

Lunch in those days consisted of PB&J (half sandwich cut in a triangle), a container of yogurt, and some fruit. So in keeping with "treating them like pigs," I fixed everyones plate and set it on the wood floor in the kitchen. 'Fine!' I thought. 'Eat like pigs!'

If you are -- or ever have been -- the mother of a toddler (or several toddlers), you know that this was not at all a punishment. It was rather, a picnic. They were thrilled that I would let them eat off the floor. I can see the thoughts even now running thru their tiny minds -- "No getting strapped into a chair! Wah-hooey! This rocks!"

Obviously I saw their clear enjoyment and I realised that even God was laughing at me, and likely thinking it was far past the time for me to just get over myself. This did not make me happy immediately. But pretty soon I lightened up.

There was another time in my excellent mothering career when we had lots and lots of candy in the house. I think it was probably winter -- January, I think -- when all the Halloween candy and Thanksgiving and Christmas goodies had just piled up. So one night, I was very tired, and it was Sunday night after church, and everyone was looking at me for dinner.

I put all the candy in the center of the table and told them to have at it. That was dinner.

See? I told you I was the best mom. Just ask my kids.

I am missing them all terribly today. True to my utmost degree in Wei-Ning, I cannot be made happy. I am tired of the bickering and constant noise when they are here, and I need a break. Then when three or four of them leave, I miss them terribly.

It's hard to be me. Truly. Let the violins begin.

Hunk O Man, Rose, Bug, and Barbie have been gone on a trip to visit colleges since Tuesday morning. They've had a great time, laughing and seeing people. I've spoken to them every day. The prospects at every school so far are very good.

They'll be home tomorrow, and I can't wait. I do miss them. It's entirely too quiet around here. The dishes take no time at all. There's no laundry. The TV is never on, and the dog is stalking me for lack of people to greet and see. Bleah. Even JB and Babydoll miss them.

Are they home yet?

xox

This Inspired Me Today

My good good friend Nan sent me this today. Nan has a job, a husband, and an extended family that keep her busier than me and my five teenagers keep me. I appreciated this so much. It's about 5 minutes long, but worth every second --

I hope it inspires you today like it did me.



xox

A Hill On Which I Will Die

I remember the days when I was in control of the mornings, and when everyone left the house, it was in a cute little outfit and matching shoes. My girls are right when they say little kids get all the cool stuff.

The way they dress themselves these days is not a hill on which I want to die. Because it would be a bloody massacre I would lose when they ganged up on me 4 to one.

This morning, I happened to be up as everyone left for school and work. Normally I'm sleeping -- but I was awakened at 5:30AM and couldn't go back to sleep.

But this was great, because I was able to sit at the kitchen table and just observe. Fascinating! Hunk O Man gives everything a little extra pat as he's making the girls' sandwiches for lunches. And he's so meticulous! Finally I can really see where Rose gets her aversion to having anything gooey or sticky on her hands.

I also took note of JB, who entered in a t-shirt and jeans. Followed by Bug, who entered in an oversized hoodie and jeans. Following them was Barbie, who wore a very cute sweater over t-shirt, tied loosely at the waist, over jeans and complete with cute scarf tied at the neck.

When I made mention of this, I was met with scorn from JB. "Who cares? Why would I want to look nice for school?" And then "Bug is wearing a sloppy t-shirt too." Bug stated that she was wearing a hoodie, duh, and she was wearing the exact same t-shirt JB had on under her hoodie.

Barbie walked in, and of course said "Whose t-shirt looks sloppy?"

JB answered with this: "I'd wear that kind of stuff if I had it in my closet."

This prompted a yes-you-do/no-I-don't exchange between Barbie and JB, and Barbie and I both assurred JB that if we went upstairs right then, we were sure we'd find something cute. JB just rolled her eyes and shook her head.

I think that means she thinks she won that one. Either that or she doesn't care.

Rose followed closely behind with a pink oversized hoodie and jeans. They all hustled and bustled around and I mostly sat quietly and watched. It was very entertaining. And this mostly because Barbie proved herself again the fashion plate. I'll be interested to see if the clothing changes at all tomorrow.

Later, Babydoll came down. Happy go lucky, homeschooled, comfy Babydoll in some kind of outfit comprised of several tanks and a pair of jeans.

Now here is a hill on which I will die:




We had a "fall apart" about this on the way to dropping her off for rehearsals last night. I quietly said, "I will say this for the last time, and I really mean it. Get your bangs out of your eyes."

She is in that 13-year-old weirdness phase we all have gone through. For me, it was always wearing a shirt or top that was almost as long as a dress. We all have some strange thing we think is cool, so we do it.

For Babydoll, it is the constant hair in the eyes.

Well, this is my last child, my last teenager, and a hill on which I am willing to die. There will be no more hair in the eyes. I will have my way despite the whining and crying and wailing and gnashing of teeth. There is one of her and one of me, and the odds are quite even.

There are bobby pins, headbands, and hair clips in this child's future, I assure you.

And in the future when she sees photographs of herself during these years, she will thank me for laying dead on the Hill Of No More Bangs In The Eyes.

Which I'm afraid I won't be able to say for all the other teenagers and their sloppy t-shirts on their way to school. Thank God for Barbie and her love of fashion. I may not be able to dress them in cute little matching outfits and shoes anymore, but I will wield my sword of No More Bangs in the Eyes with a vengeance.

xox

A Bit of a Quandry

You know, I go back and forth.

I just finished cleaning up the kitchen. This included gathering all the leftover dishes in the family room -- along with all the various pieces of clothing and single socks and paper and trash. Wrappers, junk mail, that sort of thing.

It also included putting the remains of a cake the size of Texas into a plastic container and then walking out to the trash thingy to throw the massive cardboard container away. The cake was leftover from a church thing on Sunday.

It took about 30-35 minutes total to clean all that up and load the dishwasher and wash the dishes that 1-came out of the dishwasher still with stuff on them because my girls can't understand that you should scrape off the "big chunks," and 2-because sometimes it's not worth trying to load everything into the dishwasher, and some things I just wash by hand, like wooden handled things and pots and pans.

ANYWAY -- it's really pretty easy for me to get that stuff done in the mornings. While I hate waking up to a kitchen that needs cleaning, I do have the time to do it. The house is my area -- my responsibility in the family is to keep it running smoothly and keep it relatively clean. Doing these things keeps me from being really lazy.

I use the term "relatively" very loosely when combined with the term "clean."

The girls have chores, and they are required to do them because they live here. When you live somewhere, you get to share in the upkeep of the place in which you live.

We only have 3 major chores -- those being "Kitchen," "Floors," and "Baths." Obviously the floors are just sweeping and mopping, and bath is making sure the bathrooms are clean.

In my mind, these are simple things. While it took me 35 minutes to clean up the kitchen this morning, it would likely take two people half that time. And they'd enjoy some company while doing it. Many hands make light work and all that.

The other things go pretty quickly too. We have hardwood floors in the entire downstairs, so the only thing you have to vacuum is the area run in the family room. I have Swiffers -- the vac and the mop -- for the rest. It goes pretty fast.

All this to say that really -- none of this stuff takes very long to do.

My children aren't little anymore. They are teenagers on their way out into the world. They've had chores all their lives. They know what it means to contribute to a family. They will soon learn that when they don't pick up after themselves, no one else will. They keep their rooms pretty clean. They are also very busy people with sports, jobs, friends, school.

I, on the other hand, am home all day. I have time to do the chores. And it's really my job ultimately anyway. I don't want to be treated like the maid, but I don't want to overburden everyone else either.

So here's the quandry: should we just throw the chores out the window and be done with all the haggling over who hasn't done theirs?

Or should we keep them in the name of making sure everyone knows that they have a role in the keeping up of our household?

I'm interested to know what you think.